Boner and Bonus
A lot came out of the New York City meeting, including the glorious return of Boner and Bonus of the Week.
After the meeting, the Brotherhood high-tailed it to a bar around the corner. The drink prices were inflated, and so were the breasts of the bartender. This was a sign because a breast would end up being either the Boner or the Bonus. Which one? Who knows? Anything is possible when the guys get together, really anything.
The place had a quiet discord that was waiting to be provoked. So, the DUs crowded the bar, started passing drinks back to their boys, taking care of their Brothers. Our guys made a considerable dent in the bar's beer reserves. Legend has it a bartender told Bill Strickland he got the last Black Label.
One Brother - call him Brother A - who had been smack dab in the middle of the fire line passing back drinks to the guys, got burned, he had a little too much. Attempting to sleep it off, Brother A took a nap, head on table. It didn't work. Brother A woke wanting to go home, but unable to enunciate his address. Kevin Stein '83 stepped up and took the cab ride home with Brother A to ensure his safe return. Problem was, Brother A couldn't make out his building on this clear night and after stumbling around the streets of Manhattan, Kevin folded Brother A back in the cab and returned to the bar.
Back at the bar, Brother A pecked away at his phone, but couldn't remember his security code to unlock his phone and find his Manhattan address. Ken Hyman '88 stepped up next, lifted Brother A off the ground, and shook him, trying to shake off his stupor and shake the code out of him. No dice.
The third time is the charm, especially if it involves a breast, right? A pretty young woman watching Ken go to work shimmied up and tried her breast - correction - "best" to entice the code out of Brother A, by offering in a way dripping with possibility, with blunt fecundity: "Give me the code to your phone and I will show you a tit". Everyone deserves a chance to redeem himself, and this was Brother A's shot. It's said one of the guys was rubbing Brother A's head like a genie bottle, trying to coax the code out of his cranium. No luck. No wishes granted. Too many shots. No code. No boob, but the Boner is back.
Brother Hyman ended up fishing Brother A's license with a Westport, Connecticut address out of his pocket and planted him in a cab. Upon arrival, he had to fork over $250 for the Westport fare.
Boner: Brother A.
Bonus: The young woman who tried her breast.
A lot came out of the New York City meeting, including the glorious return of Boner and Bonus of the Week.
After the meeting, the Brotherhood high-tailed it to a bar around the corner. The drink prices were inflated, and so were the breasts of the bartender. This was a sign because a breast would end up being either the Boner or the Bonus. Which one? Who knows? Anything is possible when the guys get together, really anything.
The place had a quiet discord that was waiting to be provoked. So, the DUs crowded the bar, started passing drinks back to their boys, taking care of their Brothers. Our guys made a considerable dent in the bar's beer reserves. Legend has it a bartender told Bill Strickland he got the last Black Label.
One Brother - call him Brother A - who had been smack dab in the middle of the fire line passing back drinks to the guys, got burned, he had a little too much. Attempting to sleep it off, Brother A took a nap, head on table. It didn't work. Brother A woke wanting to go home, but unable to enunciate his address. Kevin Stein '83 stepped up and took the cab ride home with Brother A to ensure his safe return. Problem was, Brother A couldn't make out his building on this clear night and after stumbling around the streets of Manhattan, Kevin folded Brother A back in the cab and returned to the bar.
Back at the bar, Brother A pecked away at his phone, but couldn't remember his security code to unlock his phone and find his Manhattan address. Ken Hyman '88 stepped up next, lifted Brother A off the ground, and shook him, trying to shake off his stupor and shake the code out of him. No dice.
The third time is the charm, especially if it involves a breast, right? A pretty young woman watching Ken go to work shimmied up and tried her breast - correction - "best" to entice the code out of Brother A, by offering in a way dripping with possibility, with blunt fecundity: "Give me the code to your phone and I will show you a tit". Everyone deserves a chance to redeem himself, and this was Brother A's shot. It's said one of the guys was rubbing Brother A's head like a genie bottle, trying to coax the code out of his cranium. No luck. No wishes granted. Too many shots. No code. No boob, but the Boner is back.
Brother Hyman ended up fishing Brother A's license with a Westport, Connecticut address out of his pocket and planted him in a cab. Upon arrival, he had to fork over $250 for the Westport fare.
Boner: Brother A.
Bonus: The young woman who tried her breast.